


memes of the round table

by donutcats



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Chatlogs, Chatting & Messaging, M/M, but all of the knights are included, i would have tagged all of the characters, mature language, this is basically a very self indulgent chat fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-16
Updated: 2018-10-04
Packaged: 2018-11-01 08:24:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 7,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10918044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/donutcats/pseuds/donutcats
Summary: Irl GryffindorGwaine told me it was a meme.Pretty Boywas that in the same convo where I told you what 'gagging for it' meantFeisty DragonIM LEAVING





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm writing a group chat fic! I've been seeing a bunch of these fics going around different fandoms, and I had the urge to make one for the merlin gang. I can't promise long chapters, or really anything that has, deep plots. It's just a bunch of bits and pieces I thought up, of what the gang would be like if they had a group messaging system. it takes place around college I'd think. seriously tho, the chapters will probably end up being short. just a warning.
> 
> I'll try to include the key for the usernames if they aren't explicitly stated at the end of each chapter, that way no one gets too confused!
> 
> I hope you enjoy this terribly not serious fic.

**Arthur Pendragon**  
Morgana has invited me to the group chat, because she’s tired of me avoiding it.  
  
**Abraca-dab-bruh**  
hey arthur!  
welcome to our home

 **Crown Emoji**  
we cleaned it up, just for you!!

 **Arthur Pendragon**  
Merlin, why do you have a ridiculous name?  
Not you Gwen, your name is wonderful.

 **Abraca-dab-bruh**  
it’s the way of group chats, my friend  
  
**All Seeing Eye**  
Welcome to Hell, dear brother.

 

**\---**

 

 **Pretty Boy**  
ayyye the party is here bois

 **Abraca-dab-bruh**  
let me guess, you're the party

 **Pretty Boy**  
H*CK YEH

 **Arthur Pendragon**  
Did you just censor the word heck?

 **Pretty Boy**  
whoa arthur watch ur fuckin language

 **I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
gwaine is irony personified

 **Abraca-dab-bruh**  
I'm still bitter that arthur hasn't changed his name to anything funny yet like wtf the fuck  
don't let morgs see that you're being boring or else

 **Arthur Pendragon**  
What do you mean?

 **duLicious**  
Morgana enjoys abusing her powers when able  
How did you think i got my name?

 **Arthur Pendragon**  
Oh no.

 

\---

 

 **Arrogant Prick**  
I'm awake, but at what cost  
What the fuck, who changed my name?  
Morgana!  
@ **All Seeing Eye**

 **All Seeing Eye**  
Arthur I'm busy, you know, _working_  
can you maybe yell at me some other time?  
besides, it wasn't me who changed your name

 **Arrogant Prick**  
Then who?

 **Abraca-dab-bruh**  
........morning arthur :DD

 **Arrogant Prick**  
#Blocked

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I flexed & the sleeves fell off: Percival  
> duLicious: Lancelot


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I call this part; sometimes you just gotta call a dude out

**I'd fuck a dragon**  
there's something so satisfying about staying up all freakin night to see the sunrise, esp when you cant fully enjoy it because ur eyes are literally on the edge of bleeding because u just spent 5 straight hours trying to describe the symbolic nature of the color yellow in the great gatsby

 **Crown Emoji**  
yikes.png

 **All Seeing Eye**  
Arthur just looked at his phone, and I'm guessing he saw the notif of Merlin's message pop up because he's now doing that weird angry huffing noises mixed with laughter thing, which I'm assuming is directed at the new name  
gg Merlin  
  


_I’d fuck a dragon >> Dragon Fucker_   
  


**Dragon Fucker**  
is that better ??  
@ **King Clotpole**

 **King Clotpole**  
I don't see how that is any better than the previous name.  
You're still claiming you would fuck a dragon.  
Also, Morgana please stop changing my name when I'm offline.

 **Dragon Fucker**  
but !! I would fuck a dragon  
u cant tell me you wouldnt fuck a dragon if the chance arose  
just think about it

 **King Clotpole**  
I would very much rather not.

 **All Seeing Eye**  
You really must stop blaming me every time your name changes. In which universe would I ever use the word _Clotpole_.  
besides, we'll quit changing your name brother when you actually put in an effort to not be so boring and do it yourself  
  
**Dragon Fucker**  
dragons are majestic and wonderful  
and if ever given the opportunity, I would not turn it down 

 **Leon**  
I can't believe Merlin is a scalie  
  
**Dragon Fucker**  
_liSTEN_  
  
**Crown Emoji**  
I love when Leon appears out of the shadows to drop wisdom, and then he slowly goes back to lurking  
it's wonderful 

 

\---

 

 **Pretty Boy**  
[kicks the door in] hOOLY SHIT GUYS I JUST THROUGHT OF SOMETHING

 **IRL Gryffindor**  
I'm not fixing the door.

 **Dragon Fucker**  
I like how gwaine's gone for like a week and no one questions it

 **Crown Emoji**  
well he is one of your best friends, Merlin, I think we all sort of assumed you knew he was ok?

 **Dragon Fucker**  
oh yeh I did, and I'm p sure arthur texted him too but it's just  
funny is all  
gwaine bursts into the chat yelling and everyone is  
sleeping squidward meme

 **Crown Emoji**  
I'm afraid we're all used to it by now 

 **IRL Gryffindor**  
Gwaine for the love of fuck, are you ever going to be done typing?

 **Pretty Boy**  
i kEEP  
starting it and then stOPPING  
CAUSE I WANNA WORD IT JUST RIGHT

 **Crown Emoji**  
just spit it out Gwaine!

 **Pretty Boy**  
so merlin's name is dragon fucker obvs  
and he's always goin on about how Down he is to fuck a dragon

 **Dragon Fucker**  
where is this going

 **Pretty Boy**  
and I came to the sudden and violent realization that  
gODS ITS BLOODY BRILLIANT  
ARTHUR PENDRAGON  
_[crying laughter emoji x2]_

 **IRL Gryffindor**  
@ **All Seeing Eye** , please block Gwaine.  
Ban him.  
Not just from the server but from our _lives_.

 **Dragon Fucker**  
i hate eveyrthging

 

\---

 

 **Crown Emoji**  
_[picture sent]_  
I love baking :D

 **IRL Gryffindor**  
_[weary face, ok hand]_

 **Feisty Dragon**  
IM DELTING

 **Pretty Boy**  
im screenshoting that

 **Crown Emoji**  
oh my lord arthur

 **Irl Gryffindor**  
....  
Gwaine told me it was a meme.  
It meant I thought something was really nice.  
Or, as he put it, "good as fUKC"

 **Pretty Boy**  
was that in the same convo where I told you what 'gagging for it' meant

 **Feisty Dragon**  
DLETING  
IM LEAVING  
BLOKCING MYSELF

 **Irl Gryffindor**  
Well, if that isn't the appropriate response to the cookies Gwen baked, then what would it be an appropriate response to?

 **Pretty Boy**  
me, looking at merlin's ass: _[weary face, ok hand]_  
  


_Feisty Dragon >>404 Merlin Not Found_   
  


**404 Merlin Not Found**  
wHY AM I THE EXAMPLE

 **Irl Gryffindor**  
Ah, I see.  
I can still use the a-ok hand as a nice response though, right?  
@ **Crown Emoji** _[smiley, ok hand]_

 **Crown Emoji**  
much better Arthur!  & thank you!

 **404 Merlin Not Found**  
im actually dying  
why is this my lif e

 **Pretty Boy**  
me, looking at merlin in any way: _[weary face, ok hand]_

 **Irl Gryffindor**  
Yes we get it Gwaine, you have a perpetual boner for Merlin no matter how many times he tells you that you're just friends.

 **Pretty Boy**  
me, when princess arthur is all jealous: _[weary face, middle finger]_


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know there's been a lot of the core four with the knights sprinkled in so far, but I promise I'll get around to the guys! I just have a lot love for the main squad

**All Seeing Eye**  
mm, I love having to explain to co-workers how gay I am.  
See Sara there's a reason that I refuse to accept any of your attempts to set me up on a date, even though technically I'm your boss and we're not even that close.  
I'm a huge fucking lesbian, Sara. I would rather snog you by the watercooler than let James from PR anywhere near me. And I don't even like you that much.  
The next time I show up, I'm wearing my "Long Live Lesbians" shirt that Merlin had made for me. Uther will surely have something to say but honestly, at this point, I'm done caring.

 **Dragon Lord**  
#me  
whenever a girl tries to hit on me and im like  
marsha, please leave me alone 

 **Irl Gryffindor**  
Me: Father, I'm bisexual  
Uther: ........anyways

 **Dragon Lord**  
im sorry but I'll always love the fact that whenever you say something about uther you make him sound like 100% improper  
_uther: its lit fam_  
is still Iconic

 **All Seeing Eye**  
Me: I'm thinking of moving out  
Uther: mr krabs meme

 **Dragon Lord**  
we interrupt your gay frustration to present uther pendragon, local meme  
  


_Irl Gryffindor >>Getting Bi_   
  


**Getting Bi**  
Me: There's a possibility I want to marry a man.  
Uther: I won't hesitate binch

 **Dragon Lord**  
arthur: leaves uther and I alone in the kitchen together for a few seconds  
uther: I Would Prefer Not To 

 **All Seeing Eye**  
Me: Can I talk to you about taking a gap year... or maybe 5?  
Uther: Try me bitch 

 

\---

 

 **Dragon Lord**  
I'm trying to say that the propensity for cryptids to hide their existence is in large proportion due to the fact that human beings are known to either kill or study anything they perceive as Unknown.  
They hide themselves away for safety.

 **Getting Bi**  
But, if cryptids would show themselves, then more people would believe in them, and they could find more support. You're also viewing it as if, every cryptid understands the thought process of man. The need to explore and learn of things they don't understand. I highly doubt Nessie has a complete grasp on the sociological hierarchy of human beings.

 **Dragon Lord**  
You said it yourself! 'the need to explore and learn of things they don't understand', which obviously translates into extensive research, most of which would not be humane. You can not tell me that if Mothman was to ever be found, the government would ask it simple questions, maybe give it a nice bed. No, they would experiment on Mothman.  
Mothman doesn't deserve that.  
which is why Mothman and others like Mothman don't want to be known. It's self preservation.

 **Getting Bi**  
There's self preservation and then there's _hiding._ If they never come forward, then how can we even try to help them? We would have to know, without a shadow of a doubt, about their plights. But until they step forward, until they come out of the shadows, then all that can be provided is meager support in the form of memes and clubs that are looked at with reservations.   
  
**Dragon Lord**  
Of course they're hiding! Cryptids would never view us as supporters. They most likely view us as a nuance. As people that refuse to leave well enough alone.   
You know me, Arthur. You know how excited I would be if there was ever proof, if any sort of paranormal being was ever shown to be 100% real. But until then, I'll advocate for their right to hide in the shadows! 

 **Crown Emoji**  
first of all- what the heck did I walk in to  
secondly- do I want to know why Arthur's new name is Getting Bi?  
thirdly-  
  


_Dragon Lord >> [X-files theme]_   
  


**[X-files theme]**  
1; arthur and I are discussing the pros and cons to cryptids and their discoveries  
2; arthur's sick of ppl thinking he's straight, you missed a whole rant about it  
3; ..........fuk u

 

\---

 

 **[X-files theme]**  
that mental illness feel when ur in a lecture trying to focus but god it's just [clenches fist]  
gili: merlin ur zoning out  
my ADD ass: I know, lmao (leave my ass olone)

 **Getting Bi**  
That mental illness feel when you're having an anxiety attack and your father is too obtuse to notice, so you have to try and soldier through it as he talks about your future.  
Which is what lead to the anxiety in the first place.

 **All Seeing Eye**  
That mental illness feel when your depression kicks in out of nowhere so you're left laying on the floor at 3pm trying to remember if you've eaten today.  
Oh wait, I had a bag of chips around 9am. I'm good.  
lol

 **[X-files theme]**  
add Plus anxiety is such ?? a fucking trip   
  
**Getting Bi**  
Anxiety and OCD?   
End my suffering.   
  
**All Seeing Eye**  
Abandonment issues plus panic attacks?  
I crave the sweet embrace of death.

 **Crown Emoji**  
sometimes, I greatly worry about you guys


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the most fun part of this fic is thinking of names for everyone

_[X-files theme] >> Spicey Boi_   
  


**Getting Bi**  
Why is it that Gwaine and Morgana never change their names?  
Nor are they pressured to.

 **Spicey Boi**  
it’s their Brand™  
like gwaine is the pretty boy, that’s just a fact  
and morgana,,, idk man morgs isn’t on often but she always knows what’s happening  
perc doesn't change his name either  
you just gotta find your Brand

 **Getting Bi**  
Spicey Boi?  
Looks like you're still searching for your Brand.

 **Spicey Boi**  
listen ok  
I was dming gwaine and it happened  
dont question it

 **Crown Emoji**  
I’m getting a bit sick of my name actually, I’m tempted to change it soon  
  


_Crown Emoji >> literal ray of sunshine_   
  


**Spicey Boi**  
cause it’s the truth

 **literal ray of sunshine**  
awww Merlin! you’re so sweet

 **Pretty Boy**  
ok but I cant believe arthur completely missed out on a joke

 **Getting Bi**  
What are you on about?

 **Pretty Boy**  
here come dat bi

 **Spicey Boi**  
o shit whaddup  
  


_Getting Bi >> Dat Bi_   
  


**Dat Bi**  
You’re all terrible.

 **Leon**  
Is that why you’re laughing so hard I heard you cough?

 **Dat Bi**  
Yes.

 

\---

 

 **Spicey Boi**  
_[picture sent]_  
hey look its my face  
I call this picture 'tfw ur waiting at the train station and ur super bored’

 **Dat Bi**  
_[weary face, ok hand]_  
  


_Spicey Boi >>404 Merlin Not Found_   
  


**404 Merlin Not Found**  
i  
cant believe im breaking out this name again  
aRTHUR

 **Dat Bi**  
At least I used it correctly this time.

 **All Seeing Eye**  
I am Living

 **404 Merlin Not Found**  
I am Dead

 

\---

 

_duLicious >> Actual Knight in Shining Armor _   
  


**Sprite Pepsi**  
your old name was annoying me  
so I gave you one much more fitting 

 **Dat Bi**  
I want to argue the point, but I can't find any fault in Merlin's logic.   
  
**Prett Boy**  
big words coming from someone with the name sprite pepsi  
  
**Sprite Pepsi**  
sometimes you just gotta be a meme 

 **Actual Knight in Shining Armor**  
Tfw all of your friends idolize you as a shining beacon of hope  
  
**literal ray of sunshine**  
now our names match!  
well, not actually, I take it back   
  
**Actual Knight in Shining Armor**  
No, they do match!  
I think it's lovely Gwen  <3  
  
**Sprite Pepsi**  
lance is so sweet he makes my teeth ache 

 **I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
gwaine just sent me a bunch of memes and said "night dick lord"  
  
**Sprite Pepsi**  
two sides of the same #relationship goals


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like how I listed relationships in the tags and yet, ships have only been Touched on, briefly caressed, the gentlest of pokes. the vaguest of mentions. I need to actually, write more. about idiots being in love.

**Dat Bi  
** Sometimes, I lay awake at night and I think about the version of Ocean Man with the voice crack on every word.  
  
**Sprite Pepsi  
** goofy singing bring me to life gets me through most days

 **literal ray of sunshine**  
the vine of ‘I won’t hesitate bitch’ tends to loop in my head  
  


_Dat Bi >> Ocean Man_   
  


**Ocean Man  
** [‘lemme smash please’ video]  
Another classic.

 **Sprite Pepsi**  
arthur during that month he tried to date gwen  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
IM HOWLING  
  
**Actual Knight in Shining Armor**  
Arthur currently as he tries to date Merlin  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
NON STPO I CATN BREATHEE

 **Sprite Pepsi  
** I dONT WANNA CHANGE MY NAME AGAIN  
LANCE BLEASE

 **Ocean Man**  
I link a funny video and this the thanks I get.

 

\---

 

 **Son of Hephaestus**  
I feel like I’m a part of the cool kids table now  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
why??  
also what a fuckin nerd name  
  
**Son of Hephaestus**  
Well, I was going to say, because I’m finally invited to the Cool Chat  
but I take it back now  
  
**Sprite Pepsi**  
[crappy photoshopped ‘we are all **_nerds_** ’ tshirt meme]  
  
**Ocean Man**  
No, we are not.  
  
**Sprite Pepsi**  
says the guy who’s go-to name is irl gryffindor?  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
nah we’re not all nerds  
  
**Leon**  
Some of us are nerds  
  
**I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
some of us could be nerds, if we wanted  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
dont do this to me babe  
  
**Son of Hephaestus**  
I take back all the ‘cool kid’ references I ever made about you lot

 

\---

 

 **Sprite Pepsi**  
you know that vine of the guy saying you better watch out, on loop ??  
that’s what anxiety feels like  
**  
Ocean Man  
** I both love and hate that vine. I can only listen to it at the very least twice before it starts getting uncomfortable.

 

_Ocean Man >> You Better Watch Out [on loop] _

 

 **Sprite Pepsi**  
me, someone who suffers from anxiety attacks: let me listen to it on loop, good idea  
  
**You Better Watch Out [on loop]**  
Why the fuck are you like this.

 **Sprite Pepsi**  
i just am  
omg I forget to tell you, but today the barista wrote Marlin on my cup  
hi it's me marlin   
like the fish yes yes   
  
**Leon**  
First, you're a bird  
Now, you're a fish  
Keep it up, and you'll hit the entire animal kingdom  
  
  
_Sprite Pepsi >> Marlin _

 

\---

 

 **Marlin  
** arthur, just listen !!

 **You Better Watch Out [on loop]** **  
** Merlin, you’re not understanding. It is statistically proven!

 **Marlin  
** I know!! I’m not trying to disagree with you im tryin to just  
  
**You Better Watch Out [on loop]  
** They did a study on it. There was even a special on the history channel about it! I know my history!  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
i walked into some sort of debate and i want to immediately leave 

 **Marlin**  
Ok but just !!  
listen listen lsitennn aRTHUR  
BABE LISTEN  
  
**You Better Watch Out [on loop]**  
FINE MERLIN IM LISTENING  
wait  
  
**literal ray of sunshine**  
[opens mouth]  
[screams forever]  
  
**You Better Watch Out [on loop]**  
wAIT WAIT  
MERLIN WH Y  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
IM LAUGHING AO HARD  
  
**You Better Watch Out [on loop]** ****  
ARENT YOU ANSWERING  
Merlin.  
  
**Marlin**  
you've reached merlin's answering machine  
pls leave a message after the beep  
since he's dead  
beep

 **All Seeing Eye**  
This is the best day of my life

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Son of Hephaestus; Elyan


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> surprise, this fic isn't dead! this took me awhile to update because for the longest time I hit a roadblock on what more I wanted to write for this stupid self indulgent chat au that will probably never have a proper ending. btw I changed the rating on this because of one of the sections in this chapter lol 
> 
> also, it should be obvious by now, but if not; not all sections are directly continuing from the one before it. between some of the sections, some time has passed, which is why sometimes things are mentioned in passing from conversations that were never written out. 
> 
> I call this chapter: i haven't focused too much on the knights which is a shame since they're so much fun to write

**Pretty Boy  
** lets change Lance’s name to ghost boy  


_Actual Knight In Shining Armor >> Ghost Boy_  


**Ghost Boy**  
i was gONE FOR 3 MONTHS AND YOU'RE ACTING AS IF I RLLY DIED  
  
**I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
resurrected boy  
  
**Son of Hephaestus**  
lazurus boy

 **Pretty Boy**  
I can't believe Lance is mcfucking dead

 **Ghost Boy**  
I’VE BEEN BACK FOR OVER A MONTH

 **Pretty Boy**  
sometimes it's like I can still hear his voice

 **Son of Hephaestus**  
Lance found dead in miami

 **Pretty Boy**  
is he alright?  
  
**Son of Hephaestus**  
he's ok but he's dead 

 **Ghost Boy**  
I still can’t believe that when I came back from moving flats, you lot had actual homemade memes about me.

 **Leon  
** We had to entertain ourselves somehow, Lance

 **Ghost Boy  
** You're all terrible, what if i Actually McFuckin Died Yo  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
we haVE UR PHONE NUMBER WE WERE TALKING TO YOU, GWEN IS UR GF SHE'D TELL US IF U DIED  
  
**Ghost Boy  
** But, what if Gwaine?  
****  
**Son of Hephaestus**  
it’s not polite to speak ill of the dead

 

**\---**

 

 **Pretty Boy  
** ok  
so  
I was thinking

 **Ghost Boy**  
That's always a terrible way to start a conversation

 **Pretty Boy**  
hey like shut the fuck up thanks  
anyways  
apparently puppet porn is a thing and

 **Son of Hephaestus**  
What.  
how do you even know this?

 **Pretty Boy**  
why does everyone refuse to let me speak holy fuck  
aNYAYS   
is it like pornception because they already have a hand up their ass  
like the puppet's getting fisted already so  
puppet pornception  
  
**Leon**  
Do you ever think before you speak?  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
do I ever what before I what? 

 **I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
no, it's not pornception, because the hand inside of the puppet and subsequently the arm that comes out of the puppet should be treated as a _part_ of the puppet  
it's not getting fisted, it's just an extension of the puppet itself 

 **Pretty Boy**  
see this is why i love you  
_[sparkling heart emoji]_  
cause you gET IT   
you uNDERSTAND IT 

 **Son of Hephaestus**  
I once stumbled on a star wars porn where kylo was just, throwing a tantrum in the bg?   
there was zero context and it was never explained.  
he was just, There. freaking out as things proceeded as normal  
or as normal as you can get when it's a star wars parody porn to begin with 

 **Wizard Boi**  
why are you guys Like This

 **Son of Hephaestus**  
Gwaine started it!   
I thought it was turning into a Thing  
a Thread

 **Wizard Boi**  
what's it say about me that the weirdest porn I've seen was 'you lemon stealing whore'

 **Pretty Boy**  
you either live long enough to grow a healthy lemon tree

 **I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
or you watch as some whore steals your lemons 

 **Pretty Boy**  
wait merlin, do you even watch porn  
like at all  
  
**Wizard Boi**  
ehhhhhhhh  
not really? I just don't, Get it. 

 **Pretty Boy**  
fair enough   
oh what about

 **Leon**  
are we all ignoring the fact that Gwaine watched puppets having sex long enough to form a strong opinion on it? 

 **Ghost Boy**  
Yes.  
  
**All Seeing Eye**    
I'm sat here, smoking a clove cigarette, tapping the ashes into an ornate ashtray shaped like a cat that Arthur got me for christmas, shaking my head at all of you.   
I thank the good lord every day I'm a lesbian and the worst I've seen is a terribly acted 'we're all at a sleepover'.   
Get over yourself, tina. No one plays sex games at a sleep over.

 **Pretty Boy**  
maybe not the sleepovers you're going to 

 

**\---**

 

 **You Better Watch Out [on loop]  
** Just a PSA;  
Never read the backlog while meeting with investors from Nigeria.   
You will laugh, out loud, the moment you see the words 'lemon stealing whore'.  
No one will understand why you're laughing.  
You will get angry looks from your father, and a mixture of confused and insulted looks from the investors.   
How do you explain, that it wasn't their presentation that made you almost choke on your own breath, but instead it was the image of a scantily clad woman sticking lemons down her dress.   
You don't. Instead you try and wave it off as a 'funny text message from a good friend' and hope they don't feel too slighted. 

 **literal ray of sunshine**  
hopefully you learned the lesson of 'put your phone away when in a meeting' that Morgana has been trying to drill into your head for years now 

 

**\---**

 

 **404 Merlin Not Found**  
man tfw you need to write an entire dissertation for psychology yet here u are, lying on the floor, trying not to die from a heart attack  
[uther voice] it's lit fam  
  
**literal ray of sunshine**  
I just got back from work, what the heck did I miss?  
  
**I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
language Gwen  
  
**literal ray of sunshine**  
oh right, my bad Percy  
what the h*ck guys!  
why is Merlin broken?

 **Ghost Boy**  
Apparently Arthur asked Merlin out on a date  
In front of everyone  
  
**literal ray of sunshine**  
wHAT

 **Son of Hephaestus**  
you know how things seemed to be going back to normal after the babe incident?

 **literal ray of sunshine**  
yeah?

 **Son of Hephaestus**  
turns out, normal got thrown so far out the window

 **Ghost Boy**  
Not even in a dm  
Straight up, in the middle of a little tiff they were having  
Please, love, read the backlog  
It's so very important  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
morgana once again misses the best shit  
im cryin  
_[crying laughing emoji]_  
****  
**404 Merlin Not Found**  
im dying  
  
**literal ray of sunshine**  
where's Arthur now?  
why isn't he online?  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
he asked, the chat fell silent  
like  
you dont rlly get that from the backlog  
but there was like a full 3 minutes where the chat was  
dEAD  
and then he said sorry and lEFT

 **Ghost Boy**  
He's not replying to my texts  
So I'm assuming he died  
I'll check in on him later


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO. I'm back from the dead. well, not really. if you follow me in a general aspect then you'll know I've posted some things since my last update, but if you're only interested in my merlin work then. Yeah I'm back from my uhhh long ass vaction what's up. 
> 
> what with the anniversary coming up, I've found myself back into the groove of merlin, finally finding inspiration for this chat fic after forever. this chapter is a lot more cohesive and it jumps around less than the other ones and, uhm, definitely longer. I got a bit carried away at points. also, it's finally earning it's spot in the otp tags that I've given it so lmao. one of these days I'll actually include more relationship stuff, I swear it. 
> 
> I present you: hogwarts houses are always an intense topic, no matter your friend group

_You Better Watch Out [on loop] >> IRL Gryffindor_

**IRL Gryffindor**  
Morgana and I just rewatched the first two Harry Potter movies.  
_and she had the audacity to say I would be a hufflepuff_

 **All Seeing Eye**  
I'm cACKLING

 **Wizard Boi**  
you can tell hes insulted because he didn't even try to capitalize lmao  
imagining arthur as a huff tho??? that's  
one of the funniest things I've ever heard

 **IRL Gryffindor**  
Thank you, Merlin!  
I'm so very clearly a Gryffindor. I'm brave, and loyal, and courageous.

 **literal ray of sunshine**  
chivalrous!

 **Pretty Boy**  
arent those just the Good traits?? anyone wanna focus on the fact the gryffs can be reckless and short tempered??

 **I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
thought harry potter was nerd stuff, gwaine?

 **Pretty Boy**  
IT IS  
but a man is allowed to read the wiki and watch the movies if he damn well pleases

 **I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
and make a pottermore account

 **Pretty Boy**  
doNT CALL ME OUT LIKE THIS BABE  
LISTEN  
I AGREE THAT IM GRYFFINDOR  
BUT ALL THE GRYFF FLAWS??  
RUDE  
JK ROWLING DIDNT NEED TO DRAG ME LIKE THAT

 **Wizard Boi**  
i dont take too much stock in pottermore  
it put me in slytherin :///  
we all know I'm ravenclaw

 **All Seeing Eye**  
Oh, honey

 **IRL Gryffindor**  
Are you actually having us on right now?  
You honestly believe you're not Slytherin?

 **Wizard Boi**  
IM NOT!! IM RAVENCLAW!! IM SMART AND LOVE BOOKS AND KNOWLEGE

 **IRL Gryffindor**  
Yes ok you're very smart Merlin.  
You're also cunning as a bloody fucking snake.

 **Wizard Boi**  
RUDE, YOU'RE A RUDE BOY  
IM RAVENCLAW

 **IRL Gryffindor**  
AND YOU'RE A DELUSIONAL BOY

 **Wizard Boy**  
NO I AM NOT!!!  
I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT

 **literal ray if sunshine**  
a delusional boy omg 

 **IRL Gryffindor**  
Hold up let me just copy paste the Slytherin wiki.  
'Slytherins tend to be ambitious, shrewd, cunning, strong leaders, and achievement-oriented. They also have highly developed senses of self-preservation. This means that Slytherins tend to hesitate before acting, so as to weigh all possible outcomes before deciding exactly what should be done.'  
I WONDER WHOM THAT SOUNDS LIKE.

 **Pretty Boy**  
watching arthur type in all caps is making me lose my god damn mind

 **Wizard Boi**  
I AM  
NOT  
SHREWD  
WHAT THE F U C K  
ALSO I ??  
SELF PRESERVATION??  
EXCUSE YOU I LOVE MY FRIENDS AND WOULD D I E FOR THEM

 **Ghost Boy**  
Merlin, aren't you always ranting about the harmfulness of house stereotypes??  
I remember another harry potter conversation where links were shared, and the merits of Slytherin and Gryffindor being two sides of the same coin were talked about

 **Wizard Boi**  
WHOS SIDE ARE YOU ON LANCE

 **All Seeing Eye**  
Join Slytherin Merlin ;)  
the common room is quite cozy and the view of the lake is to die for  
Also, I will have you know that Slytherins can be just as loyal as Gryffindors.  
But, while Gryffindors are loyal to all, putting the needs of the many before their own, Slytherins are indeed the other side of that coin.  
Slytherins are loyal to those they deem worthy. The needs of the few out weigh the many in a Slytherins eyes.  
Trust me, I've known I was Slytherin since the first time I watched Harry Potter when Arthur and I were both young. I've been an advocate of the house ever since.

 **Pretty Boy**  
morgs has gone into lecture mode  
she's srs

 **Wizard Boi**  
BUT  
i wanna be  
raven claw  
D:  
i wanna be sMORT  
i LOVE MY BOOKS

 **IRL Gryffindor**  
Trust me Merlin, you're still as smart as ever.  
But instead of obsessing over books and the pursuit of Knowledge.  
Your smarts are more along the lines of, clever and knowing how to twist a situation exactly how you need it to go.  
It's one of the things I admire most about you.

 **literal ray of sunshine**  
awwww

 **Pretty Boy**  
get a room

 **Wizard Boi**  
WELL  
mmm  
I'll think about it.

 **Leon**  
think of it this way, Merlin  
if you're not in Ravenclaw, that means Arthur could visit you frequently, since he wouldn't have to spend hours stumped by a riddle that a _door_ threw at him

 **Pretty Boy**  
AGDGSHGF  
7TH YEAR ARTHUR SITING OUTSIDE THE RC COMMON ROOM TRYING TO FIGURE OUT A RIDDLE THAT THE DOOR THROWS AT 1ST YRS

 **IRL Gryffindor**  
OI, FUCK OFF GWAINE  
  
**Gwaine**  
the real question is, how many of us here Don't belong in Gryffindor??

 **literal ray of sunshine**  
I'm Hufflepuff!  
wait elyan why is your name gwaine??

 **Gwaine**  
it was a whole thing last night at 4am  
I'm the only one that hasn't changed his name back lmao

 **Leon**  
I can't believe everyone except for the girls and Merlin are Gryffindor

 **Ghost Boy**  
I dunno lads, I could probably be hufflepuff

 **Pretty Boy**  
ur literally only saying that because you wanna be with gwen

 **Ghost Boy**  
And what's wrong with That?

 **I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
nothing. but if you were in different houses, she'd be able to wear your scarf around

 **Pretty Boy**  
how rOMANTIC  
pERCE CAN I WEAR YOUR SCARF

 **I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
gwaine

 **Pretty Boy**  
yeh?  
OH  
FUCK  
YEH YOU HAVE A POINT  
I DIDN'T REALIZE THAT TIL NOW  
WE HAVE THE SAME SCARF COLOR  
i mean ur scarf would be lorge enough for me to wrap around myself like 5 times so ppl would still know its urs

 **I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
true

 **Pretty Boy**  
do u think merlin would look good in red tho

 **Ghost Boy**  
_Gwaine_

 **Leon**  
I don't know, but I do know Arthur looks marvelous in green

 **Pretty Boy**  
HAHDGSGHFHGHGFG  
LEON ONCE AGAIN  
COMIN THROUGH  
i love u leon

 **Leon**  
the feeling is mutual Gwaine

 **Wizard Boy**  
I hate this fucking family

\---

**_Emrys > APendragon_ **

  
**Emrys**  
hey arthur?  
  
**APendragon**  
If this is about all the rabble in the group chat  
Just ignore them Merlin  
They’re terrible little gremlins

 **Emrys**  
well I mean. kind of but not really??  
it reminded me of something that I've been thinking about  
I just wanted to….. talk about  
Hhhhh  
Ok I’m just going to come out and say it yeah?

 **APendragon**  
alright?  
I must admit I’m a bit worried with how long you've been typing

 **Emrys**  
I’ve been thinking over this for awhile now, about how to word it and whether or not I even should bring it up, about what sort of reaction to expect from you because sometimes I'm not sure how you'll react to things, even tho on your best days you’re predictable. Not a bad predictable but more in the reliable way where I can guess what you’re going to say, which I honestly actually like! It’s actually one of the reasons I love talking to you, because you have a pattern to the way you speak, irl and online and it’s comfortable and  
Oh boy I’m getting off topic. Ok ok.  
Anyways, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and we both know that whenever I think, like right proper think it can take me awhile to sort through, everything.  
I wanted to ask you if you honestly meant what you said, last week. We kind of awkwardly skirted around it for a bit and then I guess we both came to the exact same decision to ignore it and proceed like nothing happened. Except it did, Arthur.

 **APendragon**  
Before you continue I want to know if this is really the type of conversation you want to have over text or if you want me to call you.  
Because. I do want to talk about it, and yes before you say anything that’s a surprise to me as well  
But, I have to admit that I did ask you out on a date in the worst way possible and we have to acknowledge that

 **Emrys**  
oh ok good. I was sort of afraid to say the words myself in case it all ended up being a realistic fever dream.  
are you only asking to call because we both know how pants you are at typing out all your feelings lmao

 **APendragon**  
I mean, there's good reason I excel at public speaking. But I know that you’re better at this, being able to write your thoughts out, than speaking out loud.  
I was the one to spring it on you, so really it’s what you’re most comfortable with Merlin

 **Emrys**  
I think  
im gonna call you  
i want to hear your voice

\---

 **Gwaine**  
I’m telling you lot  
I saw a ghost once

 **Pretty Boy**  
can we pls change elyans name  
its Bothersome

 **Ghost Boy**  
speak for yourself gwaine  
quick Elyan, say something he never would 

 **Gwaine**  
Hi I’m Gwaine and I decided that I’m never touching alcohol ever again

 **Pretty Boy**  
SHUT UP

 **Gwaine**  
oh sorry I'll try to be more like my namesake  
I'm a free spirit that will never settle down!  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
IM IN A COMMITED RELATIONSHIP  
WHAT THE FUCK DO U THINK IM DOING   
  
**All Seeing Eye**  
I think by settling down, he means more along the lines of a church aisle and rings exchanged, darling.   
  
**Pretty Boy**  
morgana don't you have anything else to do besides dropping in just to stir up trouble  
  
**All Seeing Eye**  
Maybe so. 

 **Gwaine**  
real talk tho, I saw a ghost boy  
you can ask gwen!

 **Leon**  
I can’t believe you saw Lance

 **Gwaine**  
a rEAL GHOST BOY

 **I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
I can’t believe you’re saying lance isn’t real

 **Gwaine**  
I hate this family  
does nO ONE CARE for my paranormal experience

 **Pretty Boy**  
elyan, mate  
we have merlin as a friend  
the boy that has weird shit happen to him on the Daily  
course we believe you

 **Ghost Boy**  
He asked if we Cared, not if we believed

 **Pretty Boy**  
oh then nah

 **Ghost Boy**  
kghfjhju  
Gwaine’s in a Mood today isn’t he  
I care elyan

 **Gwaine**  
Thank you lance, I appreciate it  
It wasn’t much tbh, I was just in bed and I swore I saw a little boy in my doorway when I woke up and he looked so real. not like a dream. I know what a dream is. It was just proper creepy

 **Pretty Boy**  
:////  
sorry for taking my bad mood out on you elyan

 **Gwaine**  
it’s alright, happens to everyone  
You’re still a mate even if you’re being bitchy

 **literal ray of sunshine**  
oh yeah I remember you telling me about the ghost!  
I was spooked for a few days after that  
not to derail the conversation buuuuut  
Merlin messaged me to say that him and arthur have been on the phone Talking, capital T and everything, for about two hours now, so general warning to Be Prepared for whatever this could be.

 **Pretty Boy**  
[MLG HORNS]  
THIS IS NOT A DRILL  
WE ALL KNOW WHAT THIS COULD BE

 **I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
[oh shit.mp3]  
  
 **Pretty Boy**  
MY MOOD IS INSTANTLY LIFTED 

 **All Seeing Eye**  
I’m in the middle of trying to juggle writing a thesis and making calls for my father  
I beg someone to tag me when everything happens

 **Leon**  
Thankfully, Merlin doesn’t read the backlogs. ever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to apologize for making elyan's name 'gwaine', but sometimes real life group chat memes bleed into the things I write lmao. I promise I'll change elyan's name in the next chapter, since I'm Sure it's confusing (it confused me at times too but I had too many good lines that stemmed from the name change to retcon it pft)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's been almost a year since I updated this fic, and first of all I'm sorry about that. It's been a crazy year. I got a comment recently asking for more and it made me realize that I need to either figure out a way to wrap this up, and actually put those ship tags to good use, or just, keep ignoring this fic. I don't want to do the latter so I'll try my best for the former. I'm definitely going to get into the ships, this chapter was just a bit of fun for me lol 
> 
> uhh I have no excuse for the majority of this chapter tbh. or well, I guess I Do, but no one really wants to hear about how for the last few months I've somehow found myself becoming a fan of one direction. this started out as just a joke I wrote out for my friend, but then I decided screw it I'll make it a chapter while I try to figure the rest of this fic out lmao. It's basically a big excuse to yell about my 1D opinions using merlin and gwaine. sorry. uhhh hopefully you'll enjoy it

**Wizard Boy**  
me, waking up in the middle of the night to scramble for my phone  
after learning that zayn basically said he wanted to leave 1d since the start i’ve been rewatching so much 1d shit and looking at it like _[magnifying glass emoji. eyes emoji]_

zayn's the best actor out of them all cause either he faked his entire fucking 1d career, pretending to be hapy and excited and hyped for it, or he lied through his teeth during interviews after leaving and pretended to hate it since the start  
  
**IRL Gryffindor**  
Oh my God Merlin, it's three in the morning, why are you spamming the gc with 1D ramblings.  
  
**Wizard Boy**  
bECAUSE I CAN'T SLEEP AND IT'S IMPORTANT ARTHUR  
  
**IRL Gryffindor**  
Is it?  
  
**Wizard Boy**  
like why would he do eITHER??? WHAT WAS THE POINT EITHER WAY??  
NO MATTER THE SCENARIO HE'S A LIAR  
@ZAYN WHY WOULD YOU LI E  
I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU, WE WERE ALL ROOTING FOR YOU  
wait if it’s so late why r you awake  
  
**IRL Gryffindor**  
Back at it again with the insomnia.  
Personally, even though I was a casual fan, aka only listening to the music because Morgana loved to blast them in the car and hold the aux cord hostage, I always liked the one with the hair. Harry?  
Sure Zayn was the pretty one but where's his personality?  
  
**Wizard Boy**  
oh can't relate to being a casual fan I had posters and everything  
even went to a concert once  
it was magical  
I'm a harry styles stan first and a human being second

 

_Wizard Boy >> 1D fan on main _

 

\---

 

 **Pretty Boy**  
I jst woke up and i cant believe i missed the 1d talk  
  
**IRL Gryffindor**  
You were a 1D fan too?  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
uH??? YESS??  
HELLO LIAM???????  
LIAM PAYNE ????  
_DADDY DIRECTION????_  
  
**1D fan on main**  
honestly this explains so much about you  
**  
****Pretty Boy**  
liKE WHAT????  
  
**1D fan on main**  
percival for starters  
  
**IRL Gryffindor**  
I don't follow.  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
NO  
  
**1D fan on main**  
hold on  
_[a picture of percival cut together with a picture of liam payne, and while they dont look exactly alike there's just enough small similarities]_  
beef boys with cropped hair  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
STOP  
STOP IT  
  
**Ghost Boy**  
this is amazing

 **I flexed & the sleeves fell off**  
if I'm liam, does that make him zayn?  
  
**1D fan on main**  
oh my gOD  
DOES THAT MAKE YOU THE ZIAM OF THE GROUP????  
  
**IRL Gryffindor**  
What the fuck is a Ziam?  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
IF WE'RE ZIAM THAT MEANS UR LARRY YOU FUCKIN NOBBER  
  
**1D fan on main**  
_ME????_  
AND WHOM  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
YOU BLOODY WELL KNOW  
  
**1D fan on main**  
DSSHGDSJFDSJH  
GWAINE  
  
**Ghost Boy**  
One direction is an enigma to me  
I vaguely remember when they were famous, I heard their songs on the radio sometimes but beyond that, never gave them much thought  
  
**eat the hell**  
I know some things about 1d but I think that just comes with having a sister  
like gwen wasn't a die hard fan but she liked their music  
the only song I can really remember from them, other than the what makes you beautiful one, is uhhhhhhh oh lord what's it called  
aLL MY LIFE YOU STOOD BY ME SOMETHING SOMETHING NO BODY NOBODY  
  
**1D fan on main**  
_i GOT A FIRE FOR A HEART IM NOT SCARED OF THE DARK YOU NEVER SEEN IT LOOK SO EASY_  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
_i GOT A RIVER FOR A SOUL BABY UR A BOAT BABY UR MY ONLY REASON_ _  
__DRAG ME DOWN_  
ppl were saying it was about zayn leaving but like ??????? uhm hewwo???  
HISTORY WAS ABOUT ZAYN  
"oh but the boys said it was about them and the fans"  
yEH OK SURE WHATEVER THEY WANNA SAY WE KNOW WHAT ITS RLLY ABOUT  
  
**1D fan on main**  
mitam was a fucking gift  
  
**IRL Gryffindor**  
I’m barely following this conversation but honestly it’s so entertaining.  
_[popcorn emoji]_  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
MITAM WAS A GIFTT BECAUSE IT GAVE LOUIS AND NIALL MORE SOLOS AND LOUIS AND LIAM WERE ABLE TO SHINE WITH THEIR HIGH NOTES  
  
**1D fan on main**  
THAT HIGH NOTE IN LOVE YOU GOODBYE???  
SHOOK  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
THAT HIGH NOTE IN END OF THE DAY????  
@LOUIS UR DOING AMAZING SWEETIE  
  
**1D fan on main**  
I’m so glad i get to drag our 1d convos out of gwaine and I’s dms and subject you all to what we normally talk about

 **literal ray of sunshine** **  
** you're all sleeping on Niall and that's all I'm gonna say on the matter  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
SHOTS SHOOTED  
  
**All Seeing Eye**  
Honestly I would have though Niall was Merlin's favorite.  
Since they're both Irish.  
  
**1D fan on main**  
IM NOT IRISH  
IM WLESH  
  
**All Seeing Eye**  
I know an Irish accent when I hear one Merlin.  
  
**1D fan on main**  
its called living in ireland for a few years  
and sometimes it slips out on certain words or phrases  
yOU SHOULD KNOW ALL ABOUT THAT GANA  
  
**All Seeing Eye**  
[you got me there meme]  
To put my two cents in, I’ll jump on the 1D train and say I was most definitely a Zayn girl.  
He was just so mysterious and cool but also seemed very sweet.  
Also I'm a fan of early Zayn stuff, like his first album was really good but his new stuff is a bit? mmm not sure how I'm feeling about it all tbh.  
  
**1D fan on main**  
im sure zayn is a decent dude it's just like, all the Zayn Drama that happened when he left plus him saying in interviews all the shit about 1d ?? its like  
zayn we just wanna know The Truth  
  
**IRL Gryffindor**  
All I know about Zayn is that Pillowtalk is still very catchy and I find myself humming it sometimes.  
  
**Leon**  
anyone in this thread a Louis fan?  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
IN A WILD TURN OF EVENTS LEON IS A DIRECTIONER  
  
**Leon**  
I've only been a fan for a few months, don't get too crazy. I listened to that song Merlin linked a bit ago, the Harry Styles one and it somehow lead me down a rabbit hole of terribly large proportions.  
  
**1D fan on main**  
leon's been a directioner for like two months and he's already a louis stan  
this is more than I could have ever hoped for  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
WHATS YOUR FAVORITE SONG LEON  
TELL US  
  
**Leon**  
best song ever truly does live up to it's name, doesn't it?  
I'm also a fan of Where Do Broken Hearts Go.   
it sure is a bop.  
  
**IRL Gryffindor**  
Oh lord, have mercy on us all.  
**  
** **Pretty Boy**  
_mAYBE ITS THE WAY SHE WALKED_  
  
**1D fan on main**  
_YYEOWW_  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
_sTRAIGHT INTO MY HEART AND STOLE IT_  
  
**1D fan on main**  
_THROUGH THE GATE AND PASSED THE GUUUUARDS_  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
_JUST LIKE SHE ALREADY OWNED IT_

 **eat the hell  
** I have a really bad feeling guys  
if leon can easily be lured into 1d, what hope does that spell for the rest of us?  
  
**IRL Gryffindor**  
Don't you dare Elyan.  
  
**eat the hell**  
mark my words arthur, by this time next month we'll know all the words to at least three of the songs, and that's only if we're lucky  
  
**Ghost Boy**  
I already find myself humming the tune to one of their songs  
I think Elyan might have a point  
  
**Pretty Boy**  
_AND WE DANCED ALL NIGHT TO THE BEST SONG EVER SHE KNEW EVERY WORD_ _  
_ _BUT I CANT REMEMBER_ _  
_ _HOW IT GOES_ _  
_ _BUT I KNOW_ _  
_ _THAT I WONT FORGET HER_  
  
**1D fan on main**  
_THINK IT WENT OH O H OH_ _  
_ _THINK IT WENT YEH YEH YEH_ _  
_ _THINK IT GOES OOOOOooooooh  
_  
**IRL Gryffindor**  
Elyan's name perfectly summarizes this entire conversation.  
  
**eat the hell**  
eat it.  
consume the hell.  
shovel the hell into your mouth.  
be force fed the hell by your over enthusiastic friends that you still love quite a bit.  
  
**1D fan on main**  
vore the hell  
  
**literal ray of sunshine**  
noT THESE JOKES AGAIN  
  
**1D fan on main**  
VORE IT  
  
**eat the hell**  
_VORE IT_

 

_\---_

 

_Bottom Cried Power > Emrys _

 

 **Bottom Cried Power**  
you’re my favorite person, you know that yeah?  
well next to perce

 **Emrys  
** noah fence but it’s really hard to receive heartfelt messages from you when that’s your name

 **Bottom Cried Power  
** yeh i know that’s the point  
anYWAYS  
you’re great merlin

 **Emrys**  
thank you gwaine [heart emoji]  
you’re great too  
one of my favorite people  
  
**Bottom Cried Power**  
oNE OF?? AYE  
  
**Emrys**  
yeah?  
  
**Bottom Cried Power**  
who eLSE is on that list??? eh??  
who else do you LOVE???  
WHO ELSE DO YOU LOVE BUT YOU'RE NOT TELLING THEM  
  
**Emrys**  
oH so that’s what this is  
it isn’t a nice loving message from my best friend at 4am  
no nope it’s you trying to fISH  
  
**Bottom Cried Power**  
[B]lease just tell arthur you love him so you can put us all out of our misery  
  
**Emrys**  
It’s not that sIMPLE gwaine and you know that  
you Know I can't just tell him because life doesn't Work like that  
  
**Bottom Cried Power**  
I kNOW that life cAN WORK LIKE THAT IF YOU WEREN'T SO STUBBORN  
IF YOU DIDN'T BELIEVE ARTHUR COULDN'T LOVE YOU BACK FOR WHATEVER REASON  
I _KNOW_ that you’re so hopelessly in love with each other it’s disgusting  
DISGUESTING   
It’s like that stupid quote thats all ‘you were both so busy doing whatever that you never noticed you were staring at each other’

 **Emrys**  
I’m pretty sure that’s Not the quote but ok  
  
**Bottom Cried Power**  
YOU KNOW THE ONE IM TALKING ABOUT THO  
  
**Emrys**  
Gwaine.  
  
**Bottom Cried Power**  
Merlin.   
Just. mate listen just talk to him, and i know you had that convo about going on a date or whatever, and you were sO HAPPY after that date and i want you to be hAPPY MERLIN   
blease talk to him  
  
**Emrys**  
SIGH  
we did talk tho  
  
**Bottom Cried Power**  
did you say everyhting you wanted to say???  
listen i know im not what ppl expect for Relationship Advice. gwen and lance are normally number 1 for that sorta thing but  
trust me yeh??   
perci and i had to have at least 3 conversations about all our bullshit. he needs to talk more i need to talk less, blah blah. bUT we figured it out and we're pretty fuckin solid if I do say so myself

 **Emrys**  
I always thought you two just. clicked  
  
**Bottom Cried Power**  
yeh well we do, but we also gotta work on shit from time to time  
which is what you and arthur gOT TO DO   
which i cant believe Me, Gwaine, is the one telling You, Merlin, to _talk_  
bloody hell what has the world come to   
  
**Emrys**  
mmmm  
I'm frustrated that I can't argue with any of this   
  
**Bottom Cried Power**  
also I have 50 quid on you and the princess getting together before christmas hols and I’d Heavily appreciate if you helped me out a tad

 **Emrys**  
you are a Scoundrel gwaine  
…..no promises but we’ll see what happens

 **Bottom Cried Power  
**!!!!!!!


End file.
